Chris Voss and Andrew Huberman: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations (Huberman Lab Podcast)

Last updated: Oct 3, 2023

The video is about Andrew Huberman and Chris Voss, a former FBI agent and author of the book "Never Split the Difference," who shares his expertise in negotiation. He talks about the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations, both for the speaker and the listener, and the role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations. Voss also discusses deception and how to determine if someone is lying by asking specific types of questions. The video is sponsored by Plunge and Roca, and listeners can get a discount on their products by using the code "huberman" at checkout.

This video by Andrew Huberman was published on Oct 2, 2023.
Video length: 02:53:29.

 

The video is about a podcast episode featuring Chris Voss, a former FBI agent and author of the book "Never Split the Difference." The episode is about how to hold hard conversations and achieve the best possible outcomes.

Voss talks about the importance of paying attention to emotions, both in oneself and others, to determine if information is being processed accurately and if one is being heard accurately. He also discusses the role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations and negotiations. Voss also talks about deception and how to determine if someone is lying by asking particular types of probe questions.

The podcast is sponsored by Plunge and Roca.

 

  • Chris Voss is a former FBI agent and author of the book "Never Split the Difference."
  • He shares his expertise in negotiation and discusses the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • Voss emphasizes the role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations.
  • He discusses the role of deception in negotiations and how to determine if someone is lying by asking specific types of probe questions.
  • Voss is a world expert in all forms of negotiation, including business, relationships, and familial and work relationships.
  • He teaches listeners how to hold hard conversations where they are seeking particular outcomes or perhaps where they don't know what the optimal outcome could be.
  • Voss emphasizes the importance of determining whether or not you are processing the information you're hearing accurately and equally important, whether or not you are being heard accurately when you are in a discussion of any kind, but especially heated discussions.
  • The video provides an excellent understanding of what the negotiation process is really all about.
  • Listeners can learn how to better carry out those negotiations so that they can best serve themselves and others.

Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast - YouTube

Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 001

Introduction

  • The video is about Chris Voss, a former FBI agent and author of the book "Never Split the Difference."
  • Voss talks about his expertise in negotiation and the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • The video is sponsored by Plunge and Roca, and listeners can get a discount on their products by using the code "huberman" at checkout.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 002

Paying Attention to Emotions

  • Voss talks about the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations, both for the speaker and the listener.
  • He emphasizes the role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations and decision-making.
  • Voss discusses the role of deception in negotiations and how to determine if someone is lying by asking specific types of probe questions.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 003

Chris Voss's Expertise

  • Voss is a world expert in all forms of negotiation, including business, relationships, and familial and work relationships.
  • He teaches listeners how to hold hard conversations where they are seeking particular outcomes or perhaps where they don't know what the optimal outcome could be.
  • Voss emphasizes the importance of determining whether or not you are processing the information you're hearing accurately and equally important, whether or not you are being heard accurately when you are in a discussion of any kind, but especially heated discussions.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 004

Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast - YouTube

Conclusion

  • The video provides an excellent understanding of what the negotiation process is really all about.
  • Listeners can learn how to better carry out those negotiations so that they can best serve themselves and others.
  • The podcast is separate from Andrew Huberman's teaching and research roles at Stanford.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 006

Introduction

  • Andrew Huberman interviews Chris Voss, a former FBI agent and author of the book "Never Split the Difference."
  • Voss shares his expertise in negotiation and discusses the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • He also talks about the role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations.
  • The video is sponsored by Plunge and Roca, and listeners can get a discount on their products by using the code "huberman" at checkout.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 007

Mindset for Negotiations

  • Voss discusses the mindset that he has when going into a negotiation.
  • He emphasizes the importance of figuring out what the real issue is and finding an approach that is most likely to get the best possible outcome.
  • He also mentions that there is always more than meets the eye and that it's important to diagnose early on what the possibilities are.
  • Voss suggests that it's not a sin to not get the deal and that taking a long time to not get a bad deal is better than getting a bad deal quickly.
  • He also mentions that it's important to be curious and interested in the negotiation process.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 008

Personal Negotiation Wins

  • Voss discusses a couple of personal negotiation wins that he had recently.
  • He mentions that he was in a great mood and joking around when he made a non-scripted TV show, and that the outcome was astonishing.
  • He also mentions losing a suitcase in an airport and how he was able to get it back with the help of the lost luggage store employees.
  • Voss emphasizes that being in a good mood and being curious can lead to successful negotiation outcomes.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 009

Conclusion

  • The video provides insights into the mindset and practices that can be useful for successful negotiations.
  • Voss emphasizes the importance of figuring out the real issue, finding an approach that is most likely to get the best possible outcome, and being curious and interested in the negotiation process.
  • The video also highlights the importance of being in a good mood and being persistent in negotiations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 011

The Video

  • The video is about Chris Voss, a former FBI agent and author of the book "Never Split the Difference," who shares his expertise in negotiation.
  • Voss talks about the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations, both for the speaker and the listener, and the role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations.
  • He discusses deception and how to determine if someone is lying by asking specific types of questions.
  • The video is sponsored by Plunge and Roca, and listeners can get a discount on their products by using the code "huberman" at checkout.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 012

Chris Voss's Expertise

  • Voss is a former FBI agent and author of the book "Never Split the Difference," which shares his expertise in negotiation.
  • He talks about the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations, both for the speaker and the listener.
  • Voss discusses deception and how to determine if someone is lying by asking specific types of questions.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 013

Emotions in Negotiations

  • Voss emphasizes the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • He talks about how emotions can affect both the speaker and the listener.
  • Voss discusses how to determine if someone is lying by asking specific types of questions.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 014

Physical and Mental Stamina

  • Voss discusses the role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations.
  • He talks about how to maintain physical and mental stamina during negotiations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 016

The Auditory System and Low Frequency Sounds

  • The auditory system has neurons that respond to different frequencies of sound.
  • Low frequency sounds, such as those produced by the human voice, are responded to by neurons in the brain.
  • The frequency that these neurons fire is also low, meaning that when someone speaks in a low voice, it can entrain the other person's brain to a state of low frequency oscillation.
  • This can change the emotional tone of the person hearing the low frequency sound.
  • It is an involuntary reaction that cannot be easily overcome, except by perhaps plugging one's ears.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 017

The Voice and Negotiation

  • The voice that a person is endowed with can have a real impact on negotiations.
  • The content of the words matters, but the tone and frequency of the voice can also influence the outcome of a negotiation.
  • Low frequency sounds can shift the emotional state of the person hearing them, making them more calm and receptive to negotiation.
  • There may be other tactics that can be used in negotiations, depending on the situation and the personalities involved.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 018

Examples of Low Frequency Sound Tactics

  • During the Gulf War, the military tried to use high-pitched music to try to squeeze out Saddam and his people.
  • In Panama, the military tried playing music at high volume for hours to try to get Noriega to surrender.
  • The FBI tried playing music at high volume for hours to try to get the Branch Davidians to surrender at Waco.
  • Hostage negotiators were adamantly against using music to try to get the Branch Davidians to surrender at Waco, but they were overruled.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 019

Benevolent Negotiations

  • People should ask themselves questions prior to negotiations to ensure that they are approaching the negotiation with a win-win mindset.
  • In benevolent negotiations, both parties should be able to see their own best interests and find a way to come to a mutually beneficial agreement.
  • It is important to be open and honest with each other in benevolent negotiations.
  • It is also important to be willing to compromise and find a solution that works for both parties.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 021

The Importance of Being Specific in Negotiations

  • It is important to know exactly what you want going into a negotiation.
  • Being specific about your goals can help you achieve a win-win outcome.
  • Exploring potentials can also take the form of negotiation.
  • Approaching negotiations with a win-win mindset can be beneficial.
  • People should be cautious when using the phrase "win-win" as it can be used to manipulate others.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 022

The Win-Win Phraseology

  • The phrase "win-win" should be used with caution in negotiations.
  • The phrase "win-win" correlates with someone trying to pick your pocket.
  • Both sides should feel good about the outcome in a win-win negotiation.
  • The definition of win-win is how people feel about it more than what they got.
  • In a benevolent negotiation among friends, people just want to be heard out more than anything else.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 023

Calibrating and Finding Out Where Someone's Position Is

  • Getting someone to correct you is a satisfying thing to do.
  • People are more candid with you when they correct you than when you ask them.
  • Correcting someone can accelerate the conversation exponentially.
  • It is an information gathering and report building process simultaneously.
  • Taking a guess at someone's position can help you find out where they are coming from.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 024

The Benefits of Using the Win-Win Approach

  • Using the win-win approach can make negotiations go faster.
  • It is an indirect approach that can be more effective.
  • It is an information gathering and report building process simultaneously.
  • It can help you find out where someone is coming from.
  • It can help you achieve a win-win outcome.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 025

Hypothesis Testing

  • Hypothesis testing is a scientific method of testing a hypothesis by asking questions and determining if they are right or wrong.
  • It takes you through a set of decision trees and helps you arrive at a core truth.
  • It is not common for people to be taught to ask questions in science.
  • Hypothesis testing is a way to learn and set up collaboration.
  • It is important to test hypotheses and determine if they are right or wrong.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 027

Direct Route

  • Taking the most direct route from one place to another can be faster.
  • There are great taco and hamburger spots along the way.
  • Discovering new things in a conversation can be exciting.
  • People may use certain phrases that signal lack of authenticity or trustworthiness.
  • It is important to be authentic and trustworthy in negotiations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 028

Win-Win Approach

  • The win-win approach is a way to approach negotiations where both parties benefit.
  • It is important to be authentic and trustworthy in negotiations.
  • People may use certain phrases that signal lack of authenticity or trustworthiness.
  • It is important to be authentic and trustworthy in negotiations.
  • It is important to be authentic and trustworthy in negotiations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 029

Generosity Approach

  • The generosity approach is a way to approach negotiations where one party is generous and the other party benefits.
  • It is important to be authentic and trustworthy in negotiations.
  • People may use certain phrases that signal lack of authenticity or trustworthiness.
  • It is important to be authentic and trustworthy in negotiations.
  • It is important to be authentic and trustworthy in negotiations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 030

The Importance of Paying Attention to Emotions in Negotiations

  • The speaker emphasizes the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • Both the speaker and the listener should be aware of their own emotions and the emotions of the other party.
  • Emotions can affect the outcome of a negotiation, and it is important to understand and manage them.
  • The speaker suggests that physical and mental stamina are also important in difficult conversations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 032

Determining if Someone is Lying

  • The speaker discusses the role of deception in negotiations and how to determine if someone is lying.
  • Asking specific types of questions can help determine if someone is lying.
  • The speaker suggests that people who are lying often give inconsistent or vague answers.
  • It is important to listen carefully and ask follow-up questions to clarify any uncertainties.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 033

The Science of Borrowing Things from Laboratories

  • The speaker discusses the culture and science of people borrowing things from laboratories and not giving them back or breaking them.
  • This can be little things like a forceps or a scalpel.
  • Students and postdocs value these items and treat them with respect.
  • People used to come by the laboratory all the time and borrow stuff, but the speaker's technician had a different approach.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 034

The Importance of Providing Good Reviews

  • The speaker discusses the importance of providing good reviews for things, whether it's a product or a service.
  • When someone provides good help, it is important to show appreciation and reciprocate.
  • The speaker enjoys providing good reviews and finds it actionable.
  • The speaker mentions that they take ag1 daily since 2012 and find it helpful in meeting their foundational nutrition needs.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 035

The Negotiator's Role in Hostage Situations

  • The Negotiator is responsible for rescuing hostages in a terrorist group situation.
  • The Negotiator's job is to communicate with the terrorists and try to derail the train from smashing into the US.
  • The Negotiator must be able to understand the dynamics of the situation and the difference between people who are on their side and those who are not.
  • The Negotiator must be able to collaborate with the US government and other stakeholders to achieve the desired outcome.
  • The Negotiator must be able to adapt to changing circumstances and make quick decisions in high-pressure situations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 037

Lessons Learned from Hostage Situations

  • The Negotiator learned that the US government was not highly collaborative with the Philippine government in the situation.
  • The Negotiator learned that the Philippine government was not highly collaborative with the US government in the situation.
  • The Negotiator learned that the terrorists were not highly collaborative with each other in the situation.
  • The Negotiator learned that the terrorists were not highly collaborative with each other in the situation.
  • The Negotiator learned that the terrorists were not highly collaborative with each other in the situation.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 038

The Importance of Collaboration in Negotiations

  • Collaboration is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
  • Collaboration is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
  • Collaboration is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
  • Collaboration is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
  • Collaboration is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 039

The Role of Communication in Negotiations

  • Communication is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
  • Communication is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
  • Communication is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
  • Communication is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
  • Communication is essential for achieving the desired outcome in hostage situations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 040

Identifying the Seriousness of the Hostage Situation

  • It is important to identify the seriousness of the hostage situation early on.
  • The person on the other side is gambling with their freedom and reputation.
  • The patterns of behavior are generally clear and specific.
  • It is important to get into the mindset of the person you're negotiating with quickly.
  • The indicators are there, and once you lose your illusions about how you think things should play out, you can recognize the patterns of behavior and specificity in what they say.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 042

Kidnapping Negotiations

  • In kidnapping negotiations, it is important to look forward and focus on specificity in what they say.
  • It is important to recognize that the patterns of behavior are generally clear and specific.
  • It is important to get into the mindset of the person you're negotiating with quickly.
  • It is important to recognize that the person on the other side is gambling with their freedom and reputation.
  • It is important to recognize that the patterns of behavior are generally clear and specific.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 043

Ransom Negotiations

  • In ransom negotiations, it is important to recognize that the person on the other side is gambling with their freedom and reputation.
  • It is important to get into the mindset of the person you're negotiating with quickly.
  • It is important to recognize that the patterns of behavior are generally clear and specific.
  • It is important to recognize that the person on the other side is gambling with their freedom and reputation.
  • It is important to recognize that the patterns of behavior are generally clear and specific.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 044

Double Dipping

  • It is important to make sure you don't get double dipped if you let the family pay.
  • It is important to give your honest opinion as to whether or not they're going to let the hostage go if you pay.
  • It is important to recognize that the person on the other side is gambling with their freedom and reputation.
  • It is important to recognize that the patterns of behavior are generally clear and specific.
  • It is important to recognize that the person on the other side is gambling with their freedom and reputation.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 045

The Problem of Account Hacking

  • People who have had their accounts hacked are smart but still fall for scams.
  • It's important to find out if the person has the ability to scam you.
  • Proof of Life is a way to confirm if they have access to your account and data.
  • Bad guys may just be rolling a die for money.
  • If they don't scam you when they have no leverage on you, they'll find someone else who will.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 046

Innocently Feeling in Charge

  • Every human interaction wants to feel like they earned what they got.
  • Empathy and hostage negotiations are about making them feel that sooner.
  • People who place a sense of urgency on a request are likely to be scammed.
  • People want to help and be a rescuer, so it's important to be cautious of requests that come in with a sense of urgency.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 048

The Importance of Empathy

  • Empathy is a big and important topic in human interactions.
  • People who don't know or are not close to the person may place a sense of urgency on a request.
  • It's important to be cautious of requests that come in with a sense of urgency.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 049

The Rule of Thumb for People

  • A good rule of thumb is to not respond to requests that come in with a sense of urgency.
  • It's important to be cautious of requests that come in with a sense of urgency.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 050

The Problem

  • The speaker received a text from a friend who had a problem.
  • The speaker had to determine if it was really his friend and if he could help him.
  • The speaker had to make sure it was his friend before he could help him.
  • The speaker had to find a way to confirm that it was his friend.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 051

Making Stuff Up

  • The speaker started making stuff up to try and confirm that it was his friend.
  • The speaker started throwing in some stuff about the friend's wife and mother.
  • The friend got insulted and called the speaker names.
  • The speaker sent all those text messages to the real friend, including what he had said about the friend's mother.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 053

Knowledge

  • The speaker has incredible knowledge about people hearing this and thinking it might never happen to them.
  • The speaker has known family members and friends who have made the mistake of clicking on a link and then been scammed.
  • The speaker's friend's parents were scammed into sending money to people who claimed their child had been kidnapped.
  • The speaker has had a friend who was scammed in a similar way.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 054

Communication

  • The sense of urgency should have been the first flag that something was off.
  • If the friend's parents were willing to send money, it was likely that their child was not actually kidnapped.
  • The speaker learned in hostage negotiation that legitimate questions can be asked in any circumstances.
  • The speaker applied this knowledge in a business negotiation.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 055

Kidnappings

  • Even in kidnappings, communication can be used to gather more information about the situation.
  • It is important to ask legitimate questions to find out the ultimate outcome of a situation.
  • It is important to determine if paying the kidnappers will result in the release of the hostage.
  • There are examples of situations in between getting an Instagram account hacked and a child being kidnapped.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 056

The Importance of Paying Attention to Emotions in Negotiations

  • The speaker emphasizes the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • Both the speaker and the listener should be aware of their own emotions and the emotions of the other party.
  • Emotions can affect the outcome of a negotiation and should be taken into consideration.
  • The speaker mentions that physical and mental stamina are also important in difficult conversations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 058

Determining if Someone is Lying

  • The speaker discusses how to determine if someone is lying by asking specific types of questions.
  • Asking open-ended questions can help uncover more information and reveal any inconsistencies in the other party's story.
  • Asking follow-up questions can also help clarify any unclear statements made by the other party.
  • The speaker mentions that it's important to listen carefully to the other party's responses and look for any signs of discomfort or nervousness.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 059

The Role of Physical and Mental Stamina in Difficult Conversations

  • The speaker discusses the importance of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations.
  • Staying calm and focused can help maintain control of the conversation and prevent the other party from becoming too emotional or aggressive.
  • The speaker mentions that taking breaks and practicing self-care can also help maintain stamina during difficult conversations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 060

The Legal Profession and Shakedowns

  • The speaker discusses how the legal profession can be involved in shakedowns, where a person is threatened with legal action in order to extract money.
  • Shakedowns can be used in a variety of situations, including personal injury claims and dog park incidents.
  • The speaker mentions that it's important to be aware of the tactics used in shakedowns and to be prepared to defend oneself if necessary.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 061

Chris Voss's Expertise in Negotiation

  • Chris Voss is a former FBI agent and author of the book "Never Split the Difference."
  • He shares his expertise in negotiation, emphasizing the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • Voss discusses the role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations.
  • He talks about deception and how to determine if someone is lying by asking specific types of questions.
  • The video is sponsored by Plunge and Roca, and listeners can get a discount on their products by using the code "huberman" at checkout.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 063

Wearing Them Down in High Friction Negotiations

  • The goal of high friction negotiations is to slow things down and fatigue the other side.
  • Aggressive behavior is not effective in high friction negotiations.
  • Passive aggressive and deferential questions can be used to wear down the other side.
  • The person on the opposite side of a high friction negotiation should be aggressive.
  • The goal is to get them to either relent or reveal something that's a loophole.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 064

The Process of Wearing Them Down

  • Wearing them down in high friction negotiations involves asking legitimate questions.
  • Questions should focus on how and what, rather than manipulation to extract something.
  • Getting the other side to talk about the alternative is important.
  • If the person is not giving brief answers, the Stonewall approach should be used.
  • Vision drives decision, so it's important to clarify what implementation looks like.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 065

Conclusion

  • Chris Voss's expertise in negotiation emphasizes the importance of paying attention to emotions and physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations.
  • Deception can be determined by asking specific types of questions.
  • Wearing them down in high friction negotiations involves asking legitimate questions and getting the other side to talk about the alternative.
  • The goal of high friction negotiations is to get the other side to either relent or reveal something that's a loophole.
  • Vision drives decision, so it's important to clarify what implementation looks like.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 066

The Importance of Paying Attention to Emotions in Negotiations

  • The speaker emphasizes the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • Both the speaker and the listener should be aware of their own emotions and the emotions of the other party.
  • Emotions can greatly impact the outcome of a negotiation.
  • The speaker suggests that understanding and acknowledging emotions can help build trust and rapport between the parties.
  • The speaker also mentions the role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 067

Determining if Someone is Lying

  • The speaker discusses the importance of asking specific types of questions to determine if someone is lying.
  • The speaker suggests that people tend to tell the truth in a consistent way, while they lie in 20 different ways.
  • The speaker mentions that they have been coaching negotiations with kidnappers long enough to know what they sound like when they tell the truth.
  • The speaker suggests that continually stacking the odds in your favor is key to successful implementation.
  • The speaker mentions the importance of having a bodily sensor for lying, such as the vagus nerve.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 069

The Vagus Nerve and Bodily Sensors for Lying

  • The speaker mentions their personal experience of sensing something was off around someone they knew, even though they couldn't identify the neuroanatomy of it.
  • The speaker mentions that they discovered a series of lies that all ratcheted together, despite being meaningless in the total context.
  • The speaker suggests that there is something about the autonomic response that cranks up when they are around someone who is lying.
  • The speaker mentions that they teach people to learn the difference between their gut and their amygdala, and to listen to their gut.
  • The speaker mentions that the information that comes from the gut is ridiculously accurate, and that it is due to the molecules that are put off, known as pheromones.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 070

Conclusion

  • The speaker emphasizes the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • The speaker discusses the importance of asking specific types of questions to determine if someone is lying.
  • The speaker mentions the importance of having a bodily sensor for lying, such as the vagus nerve.
  • The speaker suggests that there is something about the autonomic response that cranks up when they are around someone who is lying.
  • The speaker mentions that the information that comes from the gut is ridiculously accurate, and that it is due to the molecules that are put off, known as pheromones.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 071

The Importance of Paying Attention to Emotions in Negotiations

  • The video discusses the importance of paying attention to emotions in negotiations.
  • Both the speaker and the listener should pay attention to emotions.
  • The role of physical and mental stamina in difficult conversations is also discussed.
  • The video emphasizes the importance of understanding the emotions of the other party in negotiations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 072

Determining Deception in Negotiations

  • The video discusses the role of deception in negotiations.
  • Asking specific types of questions can help determine if someone is lying.
  • The video suggests that the gut is incredibly accurate if we listen to it instead of our fear centers.
  • The field of Neuroscience is starting to explore some of these things.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 074

Magneto Reception in Humans

  • The video discusses the idea that humans can detect magnetic fields.
  • There are some well-controlled studies where people have to guess about the orientation of a magnetic field and they do it better than chance.
  • There is evidence to suggest that these things are really happening.
  • The nervous system has capabilities that are starting to be revealed.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 075

Heartbeat Synchronization in Listening to the Same Story

  • The video discusses the idea that when people listen to the same story, their heartbeats tend to be very similar.
  • This is true even if they are in completely separate rooms.
  • This suggests that there is a passage of energy from things we hear and things we see that goes into our nervous system at a level that's below our conscious detection.
  • The subconscious is the super computer where the real knowledge processing is happening.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 076

The Importance of Paying Attention to Emotions in Negotiations

  • The speaker should pay attention to their own emotions during negotiations.
  • The listener should pay attention to the speaker's emotions during negotiations.
  • Emotions can affect the outcome of negotiations.
  • The speaker should be aware of their own emotional state and how it may affect their negotiation tactics.
  • The listener should be aware of the speaker's emotional state and how it may affect their negotiation tactics.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 077

The Role of Physical and Mental Stamina in Difficult Conversations

  • Physical and mental stamina are important in difficult conversations.
  • The speaker should be prepared for a long negotiation and have the physical and mental stamina to endure it.
  • The listener should be prepared for a long negotiation and have the physical and mental stamina to endure it.
  • The speaker should be aware of their own physical and mental stamina and how it may affect their negotiation tactics.
  • The listener should be aware of their own physical and mental stamina and how it may affect their negotiation tactics.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 079

Determining if Someone is Lying in a Negotiation

  • Asking specific types of questions can help determine if someone is lying in a negotiation.
  • The speaker should be aware of the types of questions that can help determine if someone is lying.
  • The listener should be aware of the types of questions that can help determine if someone is lying.
  • The speaker should be cautious when interpreting the answers to these questions.
  • The listener should be cautious when interpreting the answers to these questions.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 080

Conclusion

  • The speaker and listener should pay attention to their own emotions during negotiations.
  • The speaker and listener should be prepared for a long negotiation and have the physical and mental stamina to endure it.
  • The speaker and listener should be aware of the types of questions that can help determine if someone is lying.
  • The speaker and listener should be cautious when interpreting the answers to these questions.
  • The speaker and listener should be aware of the contextual nature of reading people's body language.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 081

The Importance of Paying Attention to Emotions in Negotiations

  • The speaker should pay attention to the emotions of the listener during negotiations.
  • The listener should also pay attention to the emotions of the speaker during negotiations.
  • Emotions can affect the outcome of negotiations.
  • The speaker should be aware of their own emotions during negotiations.
  • The listener should be aware of their own emotions during negotiations.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 082

The Role of Physical and Mental Stamina in Difficult Conversations

  • Physical and mental stamina are important in difficult conversations.
  • The speaker should be prepared for a long conversation.
  • The listener should also be prepared for a long conversation.
  • The speaker should be able to maintain their focus during a long conversation.
  • The listener should be able to maintain their focus during a long conversation.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 084

Determining if Someone is Lying by Asking Specific Types of Questions

  • Asking specific types of questions can help determine if someone is lying.
  • The speaker should ask open-ended questions to get more information.
  • The speaker should ask follow-up questions to clarify information.
  • The speaker should ask questions that require the listener to think.
  • The speaker should be aware of body language and tone of voice when asking questions.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 085

The Problem with Online and Text Communications

  • Online and text communications can be inefficient.
  • People try to bundle everything into one communication.
  • It's important to soften the communication in online and text settings.
  • The speaker should be aware of the limitations of online and text communications.
  • The listener should be aware of the limitations of online and text communications.
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast 086

You have read 50% of the summary.

To read the other half, please enter your Name and Email. It's FREE.


You can unsubscribe anytime. By entering your email you agree to our Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy.

Watch the video on YouTube:
Chris Voss: How to Succeed at Hard Conversations | Huberman Lab Podcast - YouTube

Related summaries of videos:

1